Bildungsroman

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Bildungsroman never looked out of his mirror towards his audience, and for a famous person, he has enjoyed an unparalleled anonymity. Unless you take the view that art imitates life, in which case...

Bildungsroman is the pen name of the famous German author D-, who began his life in the Enlightenment. His talents have been widely used in literature and has made a lasting contribution to world literature. Bildungsroman has several deconstructive permutations and today his form has been questioned by his children. However the genre that they have inherited is still widely used. His story begins at his birth and he is the hero of his own story, however he himself often doubted it.[1]

Bildungsroman's life has been a testament to self-discovery and he was famed for using fiction to reinforce his life and his character. His ultimate personal triumph was to be finally re-integrated into society and his most famed achievement was in always having a ‘dramatis personæ’ and never being himself. Also because of the use of CGI and other technologies, his fame has lived on to the present day.

Birth[edit | edit source]

It was here that the deepest stages of Bildungsroman's life script was developed, here his stages were being learnt and ultimately assimilated into the attitudes and beliefs that would later shape his life

Michael Aspel describing Bildungsroman's early childhood

Bildungsroman began his life in the most normal of circumstances according to eyewitnesses. There is a range of conflicting reports however, one of him being born in London, another in France or others claiming him to have been born and living his life in less than two days. Worse still, there's one of him being born in the Admiral Benbow Inn.

"My life began much how it ended, with little participation from myself. However through second hand information I shall tell you about the squealing parasite that I initially began life as"

He grew normally, however from the youngest age he began to imitate the characters in books and no one could tell whether he acted through his life, or whether the text comprised a mirror of his deepest self and it was a great trouble to which Bildungsroman never resolved. And if he failed, would his sensibilities take him away from his true self amidst the trials of earliest childhood? Would this not mean that his development as a hero would be retarded? It's something that many critics have later reflected upon when discussing Bildungsroman and his failings.

He had a confused ancestry with some presenting, including himself at the time, that he had aristocratic roots, however many ascribe Bildungsroman to be of the common order or just perhaps that he suffered from Heteroglossia, a rare condition of babbling in many tongues. This meant that he was contrary with societal values in which he was born. He always carried the fissiparous conflict of being a Pleb and an Aristocrat. He was blessed only in the goodness of his heart with his other faculties being average for the most part. The vagueness of his nature at birth has made his life even more difficult to assess since the reliability of specific permutations of Bildungsroman's life have to be assessed and deconstructed individually.[2]

A soothing green and an antique typeface is the very essence of Bildungsroman's character, and one of his most famous incarnations in history was David Copperfield, which featured impressive magic tricks.

Adolescence[edit | edit source]

"My first trials assailed me here, as I found that most human life was made up of tedium, however mine flew past leaving only the most notable of events. Truly my life was not a cohesive record, but an artistic fallacy aimed at recording only my trials and hopefully in towards the end, my triumphs"

Bildungsroman would rebel against the social norms of his country, and of the social order he was forced to participate in. Initially his resistance was passive, but as time progressed he strayed towards more vocal means as he had a few more arguments that he could use. These were all based on past experience that grew throughout Bildungsroman's youth.

He went on to join Marxist revolutionaries at the behest of Dr. Pangloss his philosophy teacher, whom he owed a great deal, here he excelled in causing mayhem as the social order to which he had been born slid away revealing deep rooted hypocrisy and absurd sophistries.

It was here that Bildungsroman's life could most have afforded villainy, particularly his association with Alex, George and Dim. However Bildungsroman eventually recovered from the negative aspects of these experiences. So it went that Bildungsroman eventually overcame the Tempests of Youth, and applied himself. Here Bildungsroman's "Coming of Age" was laden with benefit and it has been 'accurately recorded' many times and in several permutations depending on the recorder of the events.

Adulthood[edit | edit source]

"Of all the great things I would do, what could be greater than finding fulfillment as an adult, for from this stage I could progress to my true self which has hitherto remained obscure from my earliest years. It was of the greatest woe to me that I found the challenges of adulthood as trying as those of youth - however these challenges brought with them a new flavour in experience on the great journey I was undertaking. And also new flavours of poozle"[3]

After taking the literary scene by storm, Bildungsroman eventually found himself at the height of the profession, and began consulting with the worlds leading practitioners, from Voltaire to Charles Dickens among many others. His early efforts were characterized by taking the myths of adulthood and creating a structure that would more accurately mirror a coming of age scenario and exercising the ultimate societal virtue of making some kind of peace with the establishment.

However the genre was usually a one night stand for writers as the process of being around Bildungsroman was long and arduous and Bildungsroman's greatest obstacle[4] in life was that he kept trying to find his identity throughout his life and his trials reflected this more acutely than others. Derrida pointed out that these quests usually end in tears. Luckily for Bildungsroman and Nietzsche, he had art on his side.[5]

Jim Hawkins and Captain Flint were famously enlisted by Bildungsroman and Robert Louis Stevenson. Although the high seas were an exotic backdrop, the pursuit of treasure ultimately took second place to finding oneself on the map, and there lied the triumph which brought great fame to Bildungsroman.

Death[edit | edit source]

Bildungsroman ended his life much as it had begun, with the Godlike writer turning the page and finding little else interesting about him in his advancing years. He had a staggering point midway, however the happiness in the ripeness of age beset Bildungsroman and like so many of his models and he had found the peace and acceptance in society. This had been a struggle to attain in the vicissitudes of his youth.

"Goodbye my fair children, and to my final journey. At last, the final release and the final pages of my life, will they stop off completely? Or will new stories be the result of my now abridged, meaningful life"

As a result of his fictional life and over active imagination, Bildungsroman's demise has rarely been recorded except as fragments pieced together by his friends and apparently he passed away peacefully after living happily ever after. Unfortunately there has been no record of a meeting with God or any unlikely meetings with the Devil either.

Reflection on Bildungsroman's life[edit | edit source]

Ecce Homo!

Friedrich Nietzsche quoting John 19:5 in the Latin Bible, "Here is the Homo!"

He had seven children, The Villain, The Doner, who prepares or gives magical objects and The (magical) helper. He also gave birth to a Princess and her Father who gives the task to another whom undertakes Bildungsroman's Journey. Due to mutual hairiness of all of Bildungsroman's children, the Princess and her father cannot be distinguished clearly. He also had the Dispatcher, who makes Bildungsroman's lacks known and sends him off on his journey again.

Famously Bildunsroman appointed Vladimir Propp as the godfather of his child,[6] despite him having little expertise or presence of Bildungsroman’s life. It was later noted that the differences in culture did not prove to be a problem and in fact conventional teachings benefited the new family line. Although this was arguably quite old in itself already.

Today the Bildungsromae of literature is considered the best and most of the finest collectors have an example in their book collection. It is often celebrated that after his challenges in terms of his identity and his turbulent upbringing he eventually made peace with society and found his place within it.[7]

Footnotes[edit | edit source]

  1. A poor reference David Copperfield.
  2. You could be a true "Postmodernist" and read four books at once like we did when I was a lad. Never did me any harm.
  3. Cuntjuice.
  4. Of which there were many.
  5. The problem with a truly decadent life is the criticism, particularly if you are aware of your place in things.
  6. ...And of himself.
  7. "My formula for greatness in a human being is 'Amor Fati': that one wants nothing to be other than as it is, not in the future, not in the past, not in all eternity. Not merely to endure what happens of necessity, still less to dissemble it - all idealism is untruth fullness in the face of necessity - but to love it."